The 'S' Word
4/10/20252 min read
...“Michelle said a bad word at school today.”
“Oh? Which one?” I asked.
“The ‘S’ word.”
“Ahhhh.” Subject matter we don’t want our kids learning in school. “Do you know what it means?”
My five year old flashed me an I-wasn’t-born-yesterday look and said, “It means stupid.”
I exercised my Superpower Poker Face to keep from laughing aloud. “Do the kids say other bad words?”
She nodded and solemnly said, “The ‘H’ word.”
"Help me remember what that stands for.”
“Hate,” she said.
I was a storyteller long before I had kids. I understood the power of words. That didn’t prevent me from indulging in colorful language, mostly offstage. But the moment I became a parent, I saw the world through my child's eyes, heard the language through those innocent ears. The toads and snakes falling from my lips didn’t suddenly become rubies and pearls, but I cleaned up my vocabulary.
The first time I heard my little innocent use the word ‘hate,' I explained that some words aren’t naughty but are powerful, and should be saved for emergencies, or they lose their power. Hate was one of those words. Stupid was another. As the kids grew older, I didn’t need to be as careful. If I slipped, they assured me, “Mom, it’s nothing we haven’t heard at school.”
My twenty-one year old son’s ‘S’ word was, 'Oh, Snap!' But there are times when only the ‘Shit’ word will serve. In writing, storytelling, and conversation, few words are verboten, so long as we are mindful of the language. Before I use one of those words I ask myself, “Is it necessary? Is it audience-appropriate? Is it authentic?”
Late one night, when we were teenagers, our mother was driving us home in a snowstorm on deserted streets. She was followed home by a cop, who issued her a traffic ticket. Her crime, which she denied to her dying day, was failing to come to a complete stop at an intersection. As the cop drove off, my long-suffering mother muttered, “Bastard!” and stomped into the house. We kids sat in the car in shocked silence. Finally my big sister said, “Guys, we really need to watch our language. I think Mom might be picking it up.”
Authentic? Oh, yes. True to character? I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t been there, but I was, and that’s how it happened. Would I use it? Sorry, Mom, but yeah. I just did.